Irony

How ironic is it that I start my new blog which is technically the beginning by talking about the end? Morbid.
So, a little about me. I'm 28... Single but in a relationship. And I am adjusting to the past few years after a divorce. Long story short, I met him at 22, married him at 23 and divorced him at 26. No children, no house to split, but a whole lot of drama. And no, I am not bitter or scorned. According to a personality test I took, I am an INFJ type, or whatever that means, but supposedly I am not prone to revenge.

Just like everyone that gets married (I think) I loved my former spouse. We were young, and we had dreams, but we had ISSUES. I dreamed of a cute three bedroom and kids, and he was dealing with some major stuff. I don't want to promote negativity. I have had enough of that in my life. When I talk about him, I'm not being negative, I am describing my feelings at the time.

My husband was a sex addict.

I used to watch intervention and think, "Wow, how does the family deal?" And I was in the middle of it myself. I've been out of college for a while, so please correct me if I am wrong. But does the DSM even recognise sexual addiction as a mental disorder? If not, from research and experience, they should.

I thought the cheating that happened while we were dating (at least what I knew at the time) was an isolated incident. Um no.

Four months into our marriage, my husband admitted that he spent money on prostitutes after I found a condom wrapper in our car. We were supposed to be trying for a baby. How did it start? According to him, he was on a chat line when he was 18. Instead of a hot girl being at the meeting spot, an older guy was there. He was talked into performing some fallacious acts, and there you have it. And yes, he was having same sex encounters as well. And yes, I stayed. At first.

People have different ideas on homosexuality and bisexuality. My opinion is that whatever you are into is fine. However, I do not think it is honest to enter into a monogamous relationship without divulging information like this. Give the other party the option as to whether or not they want to be involved after a full disclosure.

So what is this blog about?
Me.
Brandice.
Healing and learning, regaining self esteem and independence, and learning how to love again without being defined as the other half of SOMETHING.


You going on the journey with me?